A few silent, uneventful months pass.
We are working in home office and hear a noise outside.
We rise to look out the window and see MIL & Co’s truck pull away from our drive.
& Co looks back and laughs like a demented schoolboy pulling a silly prank as they as they sped away.
MIL & Co had driven 250 miles to quietly pile onto our front porch all possessions of their first born son and run away like foolish school children.
- Photos,
- Drawings,
- Personal Items
Ever on when we appear at family events MIL & Co would immediately leave.
We were left with self doubt and unanswered questions.
- Was it something we said…didn’t say?
- Were we a challenge or a threat to MIL
- Was she being a protective Alpha MIL? Reverse psychology? Protecting our relationship from her own potential destructive interference? We are his 4th attempt to find happiness…
- What could we have done differently?
- Why do we have such bad luck with old women!?
…and why doesn’t he seem to care?
Constant questions:
What could make a Mother just walk away from her child?
We lose, she loses – where’s the reward?
The hardest to grasp was the dynamics of the split:
-
- he was her first born
- he was only child till age 8.
- he says he had a good childhood
- he says they had a loving relationship
And yet, here we are.
That’s some powerful juju
How is an emotional cripple like ourself supposed to process such a schizoic social dynamic as this?
As Mother said… “It is only natural for a Mother to love her first born more than the other kids… and we are #2”
Sends us spiraling into a maelstrom of analysis paralysis.
Asked ourselves many times what sin, short of mass murder, could our kids possibly do that would drive us to discard them?
Not even murder would permanently divide…unless it was we that were murdered perhaps…