Four expectant Fathers are gathered in the waiting room of the hospital. A nurse goes up to the first man and says, “Congratulations! You have twins.” “That’s amazing,” he responds “I work for the Minnesota Twins!” A few minutes later the nurse emerges and tells the second man, “Congratulations! You have triplets!” “What a coincidence,” answers the...
Continue reading...pkelley
Joke: Betty Writes Poetry
Betty writes romantic prose to Bob to send to his smart phone. Entitled, What Are You Doing? If you are sleeping? Send me a dreamIf you are laughing, Send me a smileIf you are eating, Send me a biteIf you are drinking, Send me a sipIf you are lonely, Send me a signIf you are crying, Send...
Continue reading...Joke: Bob and Betty in Church
Betty and Bob watched front row center as the preacher, recently back from a fishing expedition, regaled the packed congregation with prayers, photographs. tall tales and parables about the joy of fly fishing. “To get a fish to jump at the fly, ” the reverend shouted to the enthusiastic crowd, “Just pull that line waaaaay back!” as...
Continue reading...Joke: Expiration Dates
The contents of our refrigerator remain bland through the crisis. Cluttered with stuff we rarely use but Control refuses to give up on, Mostly years old sauces, jellies, mustard and packets of hot sauce. The rest is stuff we buy regularly lettuce, vegan mayo, sliced cheese, milk, real butter, celery, bread, sour cream, nuts, bacon, sausage, plain...
Continue reading...Covid19 Conspiracy Theory #21
When negotiating, always go for the most ludicrous proposition possible. Stand 6 feet apart, wear masks and gloves and on pain of social shame, massive fine and or jail punishment, absolutely no: Hand shakes ever again Knucklebumps Shoulder slams Of course in the short term people will resist such draconian demands. Knuckle bumps and Shoulder slams aside,...
Continue reading...Educate Yourself:
What are the Issues? Looking for a speech topic or Table Topics theme to make people think? Trillion-dollar infrastructure program Citizens United Big campaign donors Government and the environment Climate change Big banks Stricter gun laws
Continue reading...Large Print Score Cards
OverSize and Large Print Board Game Score Sheets Triple Yahtzee, Scrabble, Bunco Game scorecards in large print we have worked up for our own entertainment and now we share. Scrabble score cards Generic Score Cards, Triple Yahtzee Shuffleboard Bowling Bunco Over the years we developed forms, charts and graphs we agree other nearsighted shadows might also appreciate....
Continue reading...Memorandums on the Covid-19
Or Corona, or whatever else people decide to label the thing to score points for their own personal bug-a-boo. It’s not the sequestering that bugs us, this we can do standing on our heads. Analysts always plan for the future, which in turn makes us active, organized thinkers. Analysts take time to compare of pretty much anything...
Continue reading...Memorandum #1 Cov-Irony
Cov-Irony: We don’t go anywhere. We love house-sitting to our detriment, apparently. For years friends, family and passers by have teased us about our homebody ways. You need to get out more, experience the dream. Experience the Dream Here’s a mathematical equation: Take 7.594 billion individual dreams 24/7 (last count 2018) Formulate a collective notion (X) to...
Continue reading...